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I couldn’t bear seeing anymore of Allan’s mousy, stupid little wife or hear her irritating Home Counties English accent. More to the point, I couldn’t accept the ghost of Allan in the shape of Jamie, his son.Paul has taken Allan’s death far harder than I have. From the beginning I was aware that he and Allan were bi-sexual. That never bothered me. In fact, it added a big dash of spice to our relationship and I enthusiastically encouraged them. While Paul had sex with Allan, Allan would be servicing me. The first time that that happened was an incredibly erotic experience and one which we were to repeat countless times, with numerous permutations! Paul has now taken to sleeping in the spare room and our sex life is non existent. I need sex, regularly. Two months without is far too long. I need a man! Better still, two men!Last week I received a nasty little letter from Allan’s wife. Apparently she’d arrived home early and caught Jamie watching a filthy, disgusting and degrading video.. "Hey, Donnie, I wanted to ask you about that URL. Don't you think HornyChubbyBitches.com is kind of demeaning to women?"Oh God, here it comes, thought Martin. Nothing more deadly than a porn actress with an undergrad grounding in the principles of feminism. Might as well break out the Viagra now. "You have something in mind, Brenda?" I was thinking something a little more empowering and nurturing toward women, that reflects the spirituality of women's sexuality in a holistic and sex-positive way," she said. "Something more like, CockSlurpingFatWhores.com."She said it with such a straight face that it took Martin a moment. Then he laughed out loud, and she gave him a look that said, About time already. "Jesus, I thought I was talking to a statue for a second there," she said."Sorry, that just wasn't what I was expecting to come out of your mouth," he said."And I'll let that setup line pass, tempting as it is," she said as she stood up and opened her bathrobe, revealing an absurdly.
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